If you are reading this blog post, the chances are you are a makeup junkie like me. Have you ever felt like you needed to hide your passion? By that I mean changing yourself into someone you are not just to be accepted and loved? Today I am not aiming to give you tips, answers or solutions; I will just be telling you a story of love and makeup.
Hiding, but not really
The day I watched my first YouTube tutorial my life changed forever. Dramatic? Well, it is the truth. I clearly remembered the moment I became a makeup junkie 🙂 I was watching TV, and I saw a presenter with wonderful eye makeup and thought: “This is something I need to learn to do myself!”. Then I opened my search browser, and the rest is history…
I was immediately fascinated. I spent hours, days, devouring content. However, if we’re completely honest, makeup is a passion that requires a bit of money, so this was my first “obstacle”. As a college student, my bank account wasn’t always as full as I would have liked, but I still managed to start building a small collection. Shortly after, I even started my first blog and channel. The quality was sooo poor! But I was so proud! I would try looks with my big coloured palettes and wear them to go out. After a while, I started to hear the first comments from some friends and family members but I didn’t really care. However, when it came down to boys, things were different…
Just a girl who loves makeup and a boy
I started to notice that when I was dating, I would always go for the no makeup look or simpler looks. I thought that being a makeup junkie would be a deterrent for boys and that they wouldn’t want to date me because of it. But then my boyfriend came into my life and with a real relationship came some perks, like being free to be myself. However, I won’t lie: it took me some time to first speak up about my makeup passion. Yet after a few months had passed, I started opening up about my passion. One day, I finally told him that I used to have a channel and a blog and that I would love to start again.
When I told him, I suddenly realised one important thing: his reaction was not tragic, hilarious or any other bizarre thing I had imagined. I realised how much I had over-exaggerated this moment in my mind for absolutely no reason. He didn’t know anything about makeup, but because he loved me, he simply accepted my passion, like he would have done had I told him I was passionate about music or painting. Let’s be clear though: I of course did not build my relationship with him on lies, but makeup was that one thing that I was ashamed to talk about. Little did I know all the support I would get from him in the years to come…
When you hear or see the so-called Instagram husbands, usually they are referred to with sarcastic comments. Now I see things differently. Well, the memes are indeed funny 🙂 but from my experience I can understand and appreciate what’s behind it all.
My boyfriend, as my partner, understands what makes me happy and supports me in pursuing my goals. And this is one of the most precious things you can find in a relationship. He accepts me for who I am and without him, I would not be writing this blog post today. Not only has he motivated me to restart my YouTube channel, but he is also my positive light on those days (which are a lot) when I think about giving up. He pushed me to start this website and, most importantly, he helped me with all the technical stuff. For example, he helped design the website and with the camera and lighting settings for my YouTube channel (he is actually a videographer).
My own shame and motivation
When we grow up, or at least it was the case for me, we are taught that that we need a secure job and to cultivate our education. And don’t get me wrong, I 100% support the latter. On the other hand, we also stigmatise people for loving the “accessories”. Therefore, being a makeup junkie can be seen as a sign of superficiality. For a long time, I believed that people would think less of me if they knew that I liked makeup. My boyfriend helped me see things differently, but I have also realized that my motivation needs to start, first of all, from me. Others can help you, but ultimately you will need to help yourself overcome any fears or insecurities you might have.
To sum up, I owe a lot to my boyfriend for his encouragement to keep going. But most importantly, I am also proud of myself for overcoming my makeup shaming, which is actually a real thing and will be discussed in more into detail in another blog post. If I had let my irrational fears take over, I never would have written my Makeup Guide. The lesson? Always be yourself, or at least the kind version of yourselves 🙂